Mormonism Schism: FAR, FAR AWAY - LDS Hymn Parody #9

Monday, June 6, 2011

FAR, FAR AWAY - LDS Hymn Parody #9

Far, Far Away...

Of course, this phrase conjures up images of the movie Shrek (and its sequels) these days.

Far Far Away (as you probably know) is the land where Princess Fiona is from, and where her parents live, who are the King and Queen of Far Far Away. Quite a transition from Far Far Away to the swamp, where she eventually goes to live with Shrek after they get married (and have cute little baby ogres).

The theme of the Shrek movies, as I see it, is being true to yourself, the real you. And that's what Princess Fiona did when she embraced her real self as the female ogre, falling in love and uniting with Shrek's male ogre. And that is a very important life lesson - being true to yourself.

What great movies!! True modern classics, IMO.

And then there is Star Wars.

"A Long Time Ago
In a Galaxy Far, Far Away..."

Also great movies!! And also, true modern classics (again, IMO). And the fact that Princess Leia is a strong, competent woman in the original Star Wars trilogy is a definite plus. As is Princess Fiona in the Shrek series.

But actually, the main reason this particular hymn came to mind for parodying is because I received a request from a woman on Facebook to "let my amazing creativity go to town" (and I have to thank her for such a great compliment) on two hymns that were written by her great great grandfather, John Menzies Macfarland (1833-1892). The two hymns she mentioned in her comment were (1) Far, Far Away on Judea's Plains, #212; and (2) Dearest Children, God is Near You, #96.

So here is the first hymn parody... and I'll work on the other one next...

FAR, FAR AWAY FROM THE LIFE I ONCE KNEW
Sung to the tune of Far, Far Away on Judea’s Plains, #212

Far, far away from the life I once knew,
Opened my eyes and the truth came into view.
Mormon no more, Mormon no more,
Mormon no more, I have closed the door
On the lies they fed to me,
On the lies they fed to me.

For many years, I believed what they said,
But then I started to use my brain instead.

Mormon no more, Mormon no more,
Mormon no more, I have closed the door
On the lies they fed to me,
On the lies they fed to me.

Told to have faith when I started to doubt,

But as I struggled, I just wanted to shout

What a buffoon, what a buffoon,

What a buffoon, I must be a loon
To believe the lies they teach,
To believe the lies they teach.

Now I'm upset that I stayed for so long,
Not realizing the party line is wrong.
Mormon no more, Mormon no more,
Mormon no more, but I know the score,
It's not what it claims to be,
It's not what it claims to be.

© Diane Tingen, 6/6/2011

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MY EXIT FROM MORMONISM

As a preface to my thoughts about Mormonism (and my exit from my lifelong religion), I would like to share the following quote:

"Well, it's either true or false. If it's false, we're engaged in a great fraud. If it's true, it's the most important thing in the world. Now, that's the whole picture. It is either right or wrong, true or false, fraudulent or true."

President Gordon B. Hinckley,
Interview, "The Mormons,"
PBS Documentary, April 2007

In essence, after researching the roots of Mormonism, which obviously form its foundation, as well as examining its doctrine in depth, I have concluded that it is a great fraud. Having been born and raised in the Mormon Church, and remaining LDS until my early 50's, facing that realization was very difficult and was not done lightly.

SOME BACKGROUND:
In the Summer of 2001, I went on a Mormon Church History Tour. Before going, I decided to do some research so I would know more about what occurred at the key places when we visited them. But that was the beginning of the end for me as I discovered more and more of the sordid history of the Mormon Church. Soon, I began to realize that Joseph Smith made the whole thing up and that the Mormon Church is built on an enormous stack of lies. Sadly, I also began to realize that I had allowed the Mormon Church to pull the wool over my eyes for a very long time. But even with that realization, it took me quite a while longer to finally break away because of how intricately my life was tied up in Mormonism and how long I had been blinded by the lies Mormonism perpetuates (which, of course, is what they are counting on).

But finally, I did break away - and I have now been Mormonism Free since 2004. What I have realized during the ensuing years is that my intellectual curiosity was squelched by Mormonism. Being told to "have faith" and "just believe" was very detrimental to my psyche, particularly since so much made little sense. Trying to rationalize through everything had a negative effect on me as well, making me very confused and uncomfortable. Since that time, I have discovered that these types of feelings are called "cognitive dissonance" (a feeling of discomfort when simultaneously holding two or more conflicting ideas, beliefs, values or emotional reactions). Cognitive dissonance is discussed in greater length in a book I have written which is now available on Kindle. Since leaving Mormonism behind, I have grown so much and have discovered who I really am - and that is a tremendous gift.

As mentioned above, a book I have written is now available on Kindle. My book (entitled "Closing the Door on Mormonism: The AHA!! Moments that Triggered my Awakening") chronicles my very long journey through and away from Mormonism and discussed many of the issues that had plagued me for many years. It also contains some poems that I have written about my views concerning various aspects of Mormonism as well as discussions relative to the issues that led to my decision to eventually disassociate myself from the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints.

In sharing my opinions and the information I have uncovered, it is my hope that I can in some small way help others by offering some insights into issues that many Mormons undoubtedly face in determining whether or not their faith has been misplaced.

For those of you who are thinking, "Oh, those Ex-Mormons - they can leave the church but they just can't seem to leave it alone," I offer this quote:

"Some of you are probably thinking, 'Why don't you just leave them (the Mormons) alone?' So I ask you, if you saw a thirsty man drinking water from a well you knew to be poisoned, would you let him continue to drink or would you guide him to a safe well?" ~Christopher Miller

While I'm sure that active Mormons (TBMs) and the Mormon Church itself would be much happier if people who have left the church kept their opinions to themselves, I cannot do that. If I can help one person to see the lies that are laced throughout Mormonism, then I will feel that my efforts have not been in vain.

As you will note, I have written many LDS Hymn Parodies (to date, 111 and counting), all of which are posted on my other blog - http://exmormonhymnbook.blogspot.com/
On that blog, you will also find an alphabetical listing of all the hymn parodies I have written.

Favorite Quotes

"The truth will set you free, but first it will piss you off." ~Gloria Steinem
"To sin by silence when they should protest makes cowards of men.” ~Abraham Lincoln
"Some things that are true are not very useful." Boyd K. Packer
"I have a hard time with historians, because historians idolize the truth." ~Boyd K. Packer
"It's impossible to reach good conclusions with bad information... We're all entitled to our own opinions, but none of us can afford to be wrong in our facts." ~Mort Crim
"...just remember, it's not a lie if you believe it." ~George Costanza (Seinfeld)