Monday, September 28, 2015

WHY CAN'T YOU JUST LEAVE THE CHURCH ALONE? - LDS Hymn Parody #121

Here's another LDS Hymn Parody - my 121st.  This one is dedicated to all those TBMs out there who just can't understand why people who leave the Mormon Church just can't seem to leave it alone.

This subject was recently delved into on one of my favorite Ex-Mormon blogs - Ward Gossip (written by Donna Banta).  She covered this topic in two posts - Why Ex-Mormons Won't Leave the Church Alone, Parts 1 and 2.  In those posts, Donna brought out the two basic reasons why so many Ex-Mormons won't (can't?) leave the church alone:

Reason #1:  Because the church doesn't leave us alone.

In her first blog post, Donna cited the below:

  • Mormon missionaries travel worldwide, knocking on doors and sharing their message.
  • Members are encouraged to share the gospel with their neighbors and friends, also to reconvert "inactives," even when the so-called "inactive" has made it clear that he or she is no longer interested in attending.
  • The church springs for in-your-face advertising: TV commercials, billboard, even a feature length film.
  • Mormon temples and historical sites boast attractive, well-manned visitors' centers.
  • They have a big choir that regularly tours and records.
  • High profile Mormons in business, politics and the entertainment industry publicly embrace the faith.  In 2012 one even ran for president.
  • The Mormon Church has encouraged/pressured its members to vote for and donate money to political causes that impose its narrow values on society at large.  For example, the extreme liquor laws in Utah, the successful opposition to the Equal Rights Amendment in the late 70's and early 80's, various gambling initiatives, and perhaps most notoriously, the successful passage of Proposition 8 that banned gay marriage in California back in 2008.

Reason #2:  Because being Mormon was an integral part of our life experience.

In Part 2, Donna's post included the below:
Five years ago I dedicated a post to my husband, Mark.  It was a brief bio that outlined his happy Mormon childhood, his fond mission memories, our courtship at BYU, etc.  Then I went on to quickly explain why we eventually decided to leave Mormonism.
Minutes after the post published, I received a person message from an old friend who scolded me for being negative about the church, called me a liar, and suggested that "people like me" should "just leave" and never talk about the church again.
Excuse me?  Never talked about this overwhelming experience that dominated our formative years and consumed over two decades of our lives?  Forget "why"?  How, exactly, does one do that?

Yes, how does one do that???... especially someone like me who was Mormon for FIVE DECADES OF MY LIFE??!!!

Very good outline of the reasons - I totally agree with all that Donna posted.

For me, though, there are a couple more reasons:

Reason #3:  The Mormon Church stifled me for far too long, and now that I've found my own voice, I must speak out.
As any Mormon or former Mormon knows, the Mormon Church attempts to stifle anyone who has a differing opinion from the accepted viewpoint.  Oh, you can question things, but as soon as you are given the "Mormon-approved answer," your questions are supposed to stop and you are supposed to simply accept whatever you are told.  Critical thinking of any kind is completely discouraged, if not prohibited.  This is what leads so many Mormons to push down their real feelings and put their issues on imaginary shelves, many of which finally tumble after too many years of performing that futile exercise.
So since having broken that horrible cycle and having found my own voice, no one is going to keep me quiet about my findings.  Naturally, the Mormon Church would prefer that those who leave the church would do so quietly and keep their findings and opinions to themselves - but I, for one, refuse to do that.


Reason #4:  Because unless people talk about what they've discovered, it won't do anyone else any good.
That's why I created this blog and why I post on it regularly.  It is my avenue for getting the word out... that the Mormon Church is a total and complete fraud that, in my opinion, was made by from the get-go by Joseph Smith and has been perpetuated ever since by many others (for their own purposes).  If I can reach only one person through my blog who is investigating or questioning Mormonism, then I'll feel like it's all been worth it.

And now, here is my 121st LDS Hymn Parody, dedicated to all those TBMs who as that ridiculous question...

WHY CAN’T YOU JUST LEAVE THE CHURCH ALONE?

1. Why can’t you just leave the church alone?
Why do you just keep on bashing
What the Mormon Church is teaching?
Why can’t you just leave the church alone?

(Chorus)
Mormon Church, Mormon Church,
Mormon Church do not besmirch.
Mormon Church, Mormon Church,
Why can’t you just leave the church alone?

2. Why should I just leave the church alone?
Why should I not share my findings
And so many of its failings?
Why should I just leave the church alone?

[Chorus]
Speaking out, speaking out,
Speaking out, that is my route.
Speaking out, speaking out,
Why should I just leave the church alone?

3. Why should I just leave the church alone?
I won’t let them crush my spirit
Or just stick me in the closet!!
No, I’ll never leave the church alone.

[Chorus]
Full of lies, full of lies,
Full of lies, there’s no disguise.
Full of lies, full of lies,
That’s why I won’t leave the church alone.

© Diane Tingen, 9/28/2015


3 comments:

Donna Banta said...

Awesome Diane. And you are so right. Once a person finally finds her voice she can't "stifle herself" - to borrow a phrase from Archie Bunker. Also, we do have an obligation to others to speak up. Thanks for filling out the argument, and then putting it to music!

Diane Tingen said...

Thanks for your comment, Donna. I think you know that you're my inspiration, in many ways... for this post and many others.

Robbin said...

Haven't seen any October posts but I was really glad to find your Blog. The guy I love and adore has been away from the church but is trying to take an interest because his LDS Grandma is on her deathbed. So his mother is pushing it and the guilt of course is ramped. As I read your blog I can see just what you say about the Mormon church play out in front of me. I was turned off by the fact as an Ordained priestess since 2003 I would have to drop my clergy status simply because I'm female. I am of course not willing to do that. I help so many people yearly being an ordained clergy. I don't profit off my clergy status and help many friends and strangers live a positive life and be given the free gift of union. It doesn't take a Temple to be married and that spiritual marriage to be seen true in the eyes of God or the Universe. But anyway I hope all is well and we see more posts soon.