Showing posts with label Sheep. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Sheep. Show all posts

Sunday, August 7, 2011

IF LIES ARE LACED THROUGHOUT IT ALL - LDS Hymn Parody #34


One of the biggest remaining questions for me regarding the Mormon Church and its members is why so many of them seem to not want to know the truth.  Like in this picture, the minute someone tries to tell them an opposing opinion, they immediately shut off their minds... the ol' la, la, la, I can't hear you response.  But then again, I suppose this response is understandable when you look at the atmosphere created within Mormonism (i.e. when the prophet speaks, the thinking is done, the debate is over).  In this way, the members are more able to rationalize through all of the loose ends and apparent lies to arrive at the conclusion that the Mormon Church is somehow true.  Very clever, these Mormon leaders.

Of course, having been born and raised in the Mormon Church, I can understand where this immediate response to shut off your brain comes from to a certain degree.  Since I just went along for many years (50 to be exact), not really questioning very much and just accepting it all without much thinking or contemplation, I know how deep the brainwashing runs.  If I didn't understand something, I was given the message that we cannot understand everything in this life, but that if we endure to the end, it will all be made known to us and then we will know that it was worth it.  I was also given the message that I must not be worthy enough to understand certain things, so I needed to pray more, study the scriptures more, attend all of the church meetings, etc., and then perhaps it would make more sense.  If there's anything wrong, it couldn't possibly be that the church is wrong, so it must be that you are not worthy enough.  The ol' it's you not them mindset.  Sadly, this works quite well in Mormondom.

This is one of the things that strikes me the hardest when reading the comments posted on my blog by Anonymous in the past few days.  This person is obviously spouting the Mormon Party Line, and it seems to me that there is very little actual thinking going on.  The Mormon leadership should be very proud of this person since he/she is the epitome of The Mormon Way.

And so this leads to my latest hymn parody.  Truly, if lies are laced throughout it all, why don't they want to know?  When I began to discover all the discrepancies between what I had been taught and what was true in reality, I was flabbergasted and very confused - but I was also grateful that I had finally taken the step to finding out the actual truth.  If I am now ridiculed and mocked by TBMs, that is a small price to pay.  But regardless of what they all think, I cannot remain quiet about what I have discovered.  To do so would be to diminish the effect of the actual knowledge that I have gained.  And I refuse to be a compliant sheep anymore.

IF LIES ARE LACED THROUGHOUT IT ALL
Sung to the tune of O Love That Glorifies the Son, #295

If lies are laced throughout it all,
If lies are written on the wall,
Those lies will be its sure downfall.
Why don’t they want to know?
Why don’t they want to know?


Why do they cling to what they’re told
And all of the apostates scold?
There’s lies throughout what they’ve been sold.
Why don’t they want to know?
Why don’t they want to know?


They hide their heads deep in the sand,
And say that they don’t understand
Why we have taken such a stand
Against the Mormon Church,
Against the Mormon Church.


Instead of saying we besmirch
The doctrines of the Mormon Church,
Why don’t they do their own research?
Perhaps they’d find the truth,
Perhaps they’d find the truth.


They ask us why we can’t move on,
To Mormonism we are drawn,
They want us all to just be gone,
To simply go away,
To simply go away.


Apostates who have broken free,
Who all the lies so plainly see,
Our voices cannot silent be,
Or it will be for naught,
Or it will be for naught.


© Diane Tingen, 8/7/2011

Thursday, July 28, 2011

IT AMAZES ME WHEN I LOOK BACK...


PEACE OUT

It amazes me when I look back
That I didn’t have a heart attack
From always trying to just conform
To the randomness of Mormondom.
Finally seeing that it makes no sense
Made me face the fact it’s just pretense.
Deceptive doctrines, a stack of lies,
Sordid history they can't disguise.
Mormonism is a dead-end street
Lined with numerous lies and deceit.


You can’t do this, and you can’t do that,
Compliance is clearly where’s it at.
Obedience, no deviation,
Follow every instruction given.
That mindset would have been my demise,
Since no middle ground or compromise
Is acceptable within the lines
Of Mormonism as it entwines
Its web of lies into families,
Blurring its limits and boundaries.


And now, I’m happy just being me,
Not what they expected me to be.
An ExMormon to my very core,
No longer the sheep I was before.
Not content to be lead around,
Astonished by all the lies I found
Laced in Mormonism, through and through,
Very glad I finally got a clue.
Life is too short to be miserable,
And being free is phenomenal.


But I know what the Mormons will say,
That I've thrown eternal life away,
Separated from my family
Is how I'll spend all eternity.
Condescending, as they chastise me,
Saying that happy I cannot be.
Wickedness never was happiness,
And my sins I will have to confess,
My true happiness is a concept
That they simply refuse to accept.


So "Peace Out" has new meaning for me,
And I can say undeniably
That being free to be who I am
And not just following the program
Is a priceless gift, its own reward,
So many options to be explored.
No longer plagued by suffocation,
Or feeling like there's a huge burden
Looming over me, about to fall,
As I bang my head against a wall.


Yes, I’ve taken the apostate route,
And though the Mormons may scream and shout
About the straight and narrow way to God,
I know that Mormonism is a fraud
Invented to exercise control,
A fake religion without a soul.
The truth is out there to be found,
So glad I got out before I drowned.
I am, beyond a shadow of a doubt,
Truly happy now, and so... PEACE OUT!!!


© Diane Tingen, 7/28/2011

Friday, July 1, 2011

AND THE MORMONS JUST BELIEVE - LDS Hymn Parody #24

JUST BELIEVE.  Ah yes, that's what Mormons do, with almost a child-like naiveté.  They don't seem to care what evidence there is against their beliefs being true - they "just believe" anyway.

The tendency to "just believe" no matter what seems to be embedded in Mormons everywhere, and is (very cleverly) highlighted in a song entitled I Believe from the Book of Mormon Musical.  One of my favorite parts of that song is, "I am a Mormon, and dang it, a Mormon just believes."  IMO, that sums up the Mormon mindset, very succintly.

Another part of that song says, "Now I must be completely devout, I can't have even one shred of doubt."  Of course, that statement is true of Mormons as well - and I think that's one of the major causes of their rigidness.  If they have "even one shred of doubt," they seem to become even more immovable and inflexible, as though they are convinced that if they voice their concerns and doubts, then they will be struck down.  Personally, I think it's very important to be able to voice your concerns and doubts, and have someone reason through your questions with you.  My father, on the other hand, was a very dogmatic, pious Mormon who "just believed."  And when I would voice my concerns and doubts to him, he would tell me "not to feel that way" and to "just believe."  That seemed to be his reply for many things, and those types of responses were always very frustrating for me.

So the below hymn parody is my take on the Mormon tendency to simply "just believe," and I think it is very apropos set to the tune of Put Your Shoulder to the Wheel...


AND THE MORMONS JUST BELIEVE
Sung to the tune of Put Your Shoulder to the Wheel, #252
The church is full of mindless sheep,
Who seem to be naïve.
They simply do as they are told,
And the Mormons just believe.
(Chorus)
Yes, the Mormons just believe, it is true.
They are told the things to say and to do.
They all conform, it is the norm,
And the Mormons just believe.
The world outside may pressure them,
As they try to deceive.
But faithfully, they look away,
Yes, the Mormons just believe.
(Chorus)
And the Mormons just believe all the lies,
As they close their minds to truth in disguise.
It is a crock, that’s not a shock,
But the Mormons just believe.
With heart and soul, they follow close
All counsel they receive.
They’re told to jump, they ask how high,
Yes, the Mormons just believe.
(Chorus)
And the Mormons just believe what they’re told,
Though it’s obvious the lies they are sold.
No matter what, their mouths are shut,
For the Mormons just believe.
The web of lies is very clear,
But they cannot conceive
That all of it was just made up,
No, the Mormons just believe.
(Chorus)
And the Mormons just believe through it all,
Though it’s written very clear on the wall,
A pile of shit, it’s not legit,
But the Mormons just believe.
© Diane Tingen, 7/1/2011


In my opinion, this is a much better idea...

Thursday, June 23, 2011

ONWARD, ALL EX MORMONS - LDS Hymn Parody #21

Even though I left the church a little over 7 years ago, it took me several years after that to begin to become vocal about my disaffection from Mormonism.  In fact, I didn't even visit any ExMormon type of websites until late 2008 - and I left the church in 2004.  Looking back at that time frame, I now realize that I could have benefited from the insights of others who had left the church - and not felt so alone in my disaffection.  But I also realize that the reason I did not go on those types of websites back then was because I thought the people there were "angry apostate" types, and weren't necessarily telling the real truth about Mormon history, teachings or doctrine - and since I was conditioned in all my years as a Mormon to avoid those types of situations, I held onto that mindset even after leaving Mormonism.  You know, the whole "Anti-Mormon Propaganda" spiel.  After all, the programming runs deep - and the brainwashing is difficult to counteract.

The first time I ever went on ExMormon.org (and the Recovery from Mormonism discussion board) was in December 2008.  I had gone to my brother's house for Thanksgiving dinner, and after dinner he wanted to show me all the genealogy he had submitted to the Mormon Church's genealogy website, http://www.familysearch.org/.  Our mother had done a lot of genealogy before her death in 1977 (going back into the 1100's or so), and after her death my brother took it over and did quite a bit more, going back even further.  Of course, with the advent of the internet, he eventually submitted all that both he and my mother had done, and he was very proud of his accomplishments.  It was quite interesting to see how far back he had gotten some of our lines, and the fact that our ancestral lines include Dutch, English, French and Swedish blood.  Also, included in our ancestors are Princess Diana and some other royal blood, which I also found interesting.

In the process of showing me our genealogy on the Mormon Church's genealogy website,  http://www.familysearch.org/, he taught me how to find my way around it.  So a couple of weeks later, I decided to go back on the website and look at Joseph Smith's pedigree chart.  Of course, I had already done quite a bit of research about Joseph Smith and knew about his polygamous ways (as well as the fact that at the time of his death, he was married to 33 women).  In fact, issues related to Polygamy had always bothered me, and during my research, I had discovered some of the truth behind Polygamy, including the fact that Joseph Smith had married 10 teenage girls (including one as young as 14 named Helen Mar Kimball) and the fact that he lied about the practice of polygamy numerous times.  In fact, one of my favorite quotes of Joseph Smith is this one: 

"...What a thing it is for a man to be accused of committing adultery, and having seven wives, when I can only find one. I am the same man, and as innocent as I was fourteen years ago; and I can prove them all perjurers." (History of the Church, vol 6, p. 411) 

This statement was made by Joseph Smith as he was preaching from the stand in Nauvoo on Sunday, May 26, 1844.  This was a month before his death - and at that time, Joseph Smith had 33 plural wives.
Was it okay for him to lie about his practice of polygamy?  No, it wasn't.  In fact, on June 8, 1844, when the Nauvoo Expositor newspaper was printed and distributed, and the story ran publicly exposing the truth about Joseph Smith's practice of polygamy, was it okay for Joseph Smith to order the destruction of the printing press and the burning of the building in which it was housed?  No, definitely not.  Those acts are why he was arrested and why he was incarcerated in Carthage Jail, where he was killed by gunshot from a mob on June 27, 1844.  Of course, when I discovered this, I realized that Joseph Smith was not a martyr, but rather a criminal.  For him to be "praised" and held out as a martyr by the Mormon Church is extremely deceptive.

And after polygamy was outlawed and the Manifesto was issued in 1890, was it okay for other Mormon prophets and apostles to lie about their involvement in polygamy?  No, definitely not.  They agreed to stop polygamy in order for Utah to become a state, but history shows that they continued to practice it until at least 1910.  And when they were questioned about it, they simply lied. 

When I began to look around this genealogy website (created and operated by the Mormon Church), I saw all the women's names who had married Joseph Smith.  Several of the names had links - and when I drilled down below these names, I discovered that they were married to other men when they married Joseph Smith.  This was the beginnings of my discovery of Polyandry, and that aspect of the practice of Polygamy truly stunned me.  Truly, I was flabbergasted, not only due to my discovery of this, but again, because I had never in all my years as a Mormon, heard anything about Polyandry before.  This aspect of my research is discussed in great detail in the book I have written, which is found on this blog.

It was after that when I first went on http://www.exmormon.org/ - and I was guided there by a Google search which included a link to an article on Polyandry written by Bob McCue.  This article was a huge revelation for me, and although I had already left the church due to my many other issues, the information about Polyandry was an additional eye-opener in my disaffection from the Mormon Church.  To think that I was a member of the Mormon Church for 52 years and never knew about Joseph Smith marrying women who were already married to living husbands is mind-boggling to me.  But of course, the reason I didn't know is because the Mormon Church tries very hard to cover up this kind of information.  They say they don't hide it, that the history has always been open to whoever wants to know about it, but the reality is that the majority of members of the Mormon Church do not know about the details of most of what happened in the beginnings of Mormonism because they just don't talk about it.  And usually when they do hear about it, they write it off as "Anti-Mormon Propaganda."

After my first time visiting the website http://www.exmormon.org/, I went on their discussion board - Recovery from Mormonism.  Over the next year or so, I spent a good amount of time reading and commenting on various threads.  Eventually, I found http://www.postmormon.org/ and regularly visited their discussion board as well.  That is where I found out about the annual ExMormon Foundation Conference, and I went to one last year for the first time (October 2010).  It was great meeting a lot of the people with whom I had been exchanging messages on the discussion boards, and I consider many of these people to now be my very good friends. 

After that, I was invited to join a couple of Facebook discussion groups, and I have met some other amazing people on there - Former Mormons, PostMormons, ExMormons, others who are questioning Mormonism, and still others who know for certain that the church is not true but are still going to church because of family pressures (sometimes called Shadow Mormons).  I have become very close "cyber-friends" with many of these people, and am planning on meeting many of them at the next ExMormon Foundation Conference in October 2011. 

 It has been quite a journey over the past 3 years.  Through it all, I have seen myself evolve from what I would consider a Former Mormon woman who kept quiet about what I had discovered, not having reached a point where I felt comfortable expressing my views, to a full-blown ExMormon who is very vocal about what I consider to be a destructive religious organization that deals very fast and loose with the truth.

And so, here is my latest hymn parody... a tribute to ExMormons everywhere...

ONWARD, ALL EXMORMONS

Onward, all ExMormons,
We’re no longer sheep.
Done with just believing,
And the lies so deep.
Blind belief no longer,
Finally got a clue,
And with all our knowledge,
We know it’s not true.

(Chorus)
Onward, all ExMormons,
We’re no longer sheep.
Done with just believing,
And the lies so deep.

With the many issues
Struggling as we did,
It was quite disturbing
To find what they hid.
History very sordid,
Teachings so bizarre,
Done with the denial,
We have come so far.

(Chorus)
Onward, all ExMormons,
We’re no longer sheep.
Done with just believing,
And the lies so deep.

Joseph Smith, a liar,
Con man all the way,
Charlatan and shyster,
Deception, his forte.
He was not a martyr,
As the Mormons say.
Just a phony Prophet
Feeding on his prey.

(Chorus)
Onward, all ExMormons,
We’re no longer sheep.
Done with just believing,
And the lies so deep.

There are many others
Still within the cult,
Trapped by their denial,
And as a result,
We must try to help them
Sort through all the lies,
Maybe through our efforts
Fraud they’ll recognize.

(Chorus)
Onward, all ExMormons,
We’re no longer sheep.
Done with just believing,
And the lies so deep.

© Diane Tingen, 6/23/2011

Sunday, June 19, 2011

JUST USE YOUR BRAIN - LDS Hymn Parody #18

Although I left the Mormon Church a little over 7 years ago, there are many aspects of it that still puzzle me. After doing my own independent research, and discovering that what I once thought was the "one and only true church on the face of the earth" is actually built on a stack of lies, I have continued to find it very puzzling as to why there are so many intelligent people who strongly believe in its tenets. And that is one of my main remaining fascinations with Mormonism and its hold on people. Why do they continue to believe when it is seems to be very clear that it is not true? Why do they simply accept it, right down the line, relying on blind faith rather than actual reasoning? Why do they cite "feelings" as a supposed valid reason for their belief when there is a mountain of evidence against it being true? Why do they assume that "Anti-Mormon Propaganda" is the explanation for whatever negative stance is taken against the Mormon Church when in actuality what is being stated is valid information against Mormonism? Why don't members do their own independent research instead of just going along and deciding to "just believe"?  Very puzzling.

The membership of the Mormon Church is made up of a diverse array of people - and includes a wide spectrum of very educated people with advanced degrees (undergraduate, Master's Degrees, Ph.D's, Juris Doctors, Medical degrees, etc.) and people whose professions include doctors, lawyers, teachers, professors, and so on. So if the church is actually an elaborate web of lies, why do these types of obviously intelligent people continue to believe in it? For me, that is the ultimate question - and it fascinates me.

What it seems to come down to is that these types of people, who are true believers, apply one type of reasoning to their lives in general, and another one to their religion. Although they obviously apply critical thinking skills to situations in their careers and lives in general, the same degree of scrutiny is not applied to their religion. They very simply "just believe" without examining and/or analyzing their belief system. One example of that is a Mormon man who I have exchanged several messages with on Facebook - first in commenting on a friend's thread, and then in several PMs. He is a lawyer, and is obviously very intelligent. He writes very well, and obviously puts a lot of thought into his comments and messages. But he is also a very devout Mormon who does not, by any stretch of the imagination, apply the critical thinking skills that he was taught in law school to his religion. He cites the Mormon Party Line down the line, and defends each and every precept as if his life depends on it. I have asked him why, since he was taught critical thinking skills in law school, he does not give Mormonism the benefits of such skills and look at it with an examining eye.

In fact, in one of my comments, I asked him, "...you're obviously a very intelligent man, evident not only from your writings but also from the fact that you have a law degree and a clerkship at the USDC. I'm sure in law school you learned how to analyze and dissect information... to scrutinize ideas and concepts. I'm curious as to why you haven't applied that scrutiny to Mormonism, particularly since from the evidence, it appears to have been a hoax from the get-go."

And this was his reply: "@Diane: Well, someone did their homework. There are two answers to your question: When it comes to my unquantifiable testimony, I can’t scrutinize it adequately. If you can’t tell, I’m obsessed with having good information and properly identifying what assumptions are being made to make a premise hold or fail. Regardless of what you believe, there are some real complexities to the human experience that simply can’t be analyzed rationally because the occurrences that happen would otherwise be irrational, except that they really happen. What that means for me is there is information that is unavailable. There’s stuff that I can’t sort out in my head. And in all the teachings of the Church, etc., I have found a certain degree of comfort that all these unquantifiable happenings accurately translate into a testimony. Now, that means nothing to you. I get it. But it means something to me, and it’s very persuasive. Second, if you want to examine truth apologetically, I am intellectually convinced the Church is true. That’s not to say there are no holes. But taking everything together and looking at all the evidence, my judgment is that the preponderance of the evidence swings toward a conclusion of truth. Now, the important part is that although we can disagree on the result, we cannot, however, disagree on the presentations of the evidence. And a big problem in the critical arguments against the Church is that they are premised on bad assumptions. For every issue you can raise, there is a bad assumption (I think). For example: Why did God change his mind about black people? There are multiple major false assumptions in that statement. And so applying “my scrutiny,” I take a step back, analyze the question, dissect it, and realize that the question is a bad one because it improperly begs a variety of questions. Once I can identify the fallacious portions, the analysis is actually really easy. So the question is: can you see the false assumptions? Something that magnifies the problems of this critical analysis is that Mormon culture really, really gets in the way. If we take Brigham Young at his word that most Mormons are going to hell, then we can’t very well rely on the idiosyncrasies of the membership to accurately reflect doctrine. And if we are critically analyzing practice instead of doctrine, the conclusion is wholly illusory. Problem is that many of these idiosyncrasies take on a life of its own. I think a perfect example is the Salt Lake City Council and how close they were to throwing the gay-rights ordinance to curb before the church stepped in and said it should pass. The same thing has happened on immigration, etc. Church members have misinterpreted the church’s (conservative) actions in one sphere, and become zealots for a false cause in another. As far as affirmative apologetics, there is a lot. But since I’m in the court system, let me give one example that resounds quite strongly for me: The three witnesses. Now, I’m aware of the holes (generally based on false assumptions and contexts). But the uncontroverted evidence is that each died with a dying declaration that what he said about the Book of Mormon was true. And that includes Whitmer, whom never came back to the church. Sure – they generally disliked (if not hated) Joseph Smith at some point, and even thought of him as a fallen prophet. But they never denied their experiences and affirmed what they had previously seen with their dying breath. As a policy matter, such evidence is very reliable. And the critics have been completely unable to explain it away. Being part of a team that sits, listens, and weighs evidence, I can’t objectively conclude anything else except to say there’s probably something to it."

Interesting response - very well thought out and expressed. The fact is that this man is obviously very intelligent, but the way in which he analyzes information about the Mormon Church seems to always end up putting him on the side of belief, even though there are (it seems to me) some very flawed methods in his "analysis." Circular Reasoning. Beginning from the pre-conceived notion that the church is true, and framing everything that he "analyzes" to that end. After this, we exchanged a few PMs, and his take on it all continues to puzzle me.

So although I've put Mormonism behind me, I still like discussing it and blogging about it, mainly because I am puzzled by why so many obviously intelligent people buy it, lock, stock and barrel. But I am convinced that if these people would just use their brains and their critical thinking skills instead of simply accepting the Mormon Party Line, they might actually see the lies, deceptions, cover-ups and contradictions embodied within Mormonism.

And this is the theme of my latest hymn parody.

JUST USE YOUR BRAIN
Sung to the tune of Do What is Right, #237

Just use your brain,
Your reasoning powers,
Inquiry with your own mind just makes sense.
Don’t follow blindly and simply accept it,
Don’t be a sheep, let your thinking commence.


(Chorus)
Just use your brain,
Let your reasoning powers
Tell you what’s right and what you should believe.
It makes more sense to use critical thinking,
Blindly obeying, don’t be that naïve.


Just use your brain,
Your rose-colored glasses
Simply obscure what reality shouts.
If you believe it without proper study,
All you are doing is squelching your doubts.


(Chorus)
Just use your brain
Let your reasoning powers
Tell you what’s right and what you should believe.
It makes more sense to use critical thinking,
Blindly obeying, don’t be that naïve.


Just use your brain,
Don’t just shelve your issues,
There is no wisdom in stifling yourself.
Don’t stuff it down, and then suffer in silence,
As you place more and more there on your shelf.


(Chorus)
Just use your brain
Let your reasoning powers
Tell you what’s right and what you should believe.
It makes more sense to use critical thinking,
Blindly obeying, don’t be that naïve.


© Diane Tingen, 6/19/2011

Friday, June 17, 2011

WHAT THE HELL? LDS Hymn Parody #17

Wow, how many times have I asked myself WHAT THE HELL???... and wanted to scream it out loud???  I have faced that dilemma innumerable times during my life (for varying reasons).  But of course, since I was the "good girl" for most of my life, I just kept my differing opinions to myself.  Never wanting to rock the boat.  Always trying to keep the peace.

But once I discovered the lies, deceptions and contradictions laced throughout Mormonism, and processed through the fact that I had believed in and followed this skewed religion my entire life, I became incresingly outraged and began to express my shock and disgust. 

Of course, this blog is an outgrowth of the emergence of the "new me."  A woman who no longer just goes along... a woman who knows what she thinks and isn't afraid (any longer) of expressing her thoughts, no matter what others may think or say... a woman who spent 52 years in the Mormon Church, toeing the line and adhering to its ridiculous teachings and doctrine, all of which are not "of God," but rather made up by Joseph Smith, the founder of the Mormon Church, and its first Prophet and Seer, and perpetuated by countless other men through the years.

So my hymn parody addressing these concepts is quite appropriately a revision of "Choose the Right."  There are many great thoughts in the original hymn, but sadly, those thoughts are not in line with the realities of Mormonism - a religion that purports to highly value honesty and integrity (and choosing the right), but plays very fast and loose with the truth in many ways. 

WHAT THE HELL?
Sung to the tune of Choose the Right, #239

What the hell?  Do they really think I'm stupid?
I can think, and I'm not that naïve.
Not a sheep, and I simply will not follow
The Mormon Party Line and "just believe."

(Chorus)
What the hell?  What the hell?
Let knowledge guide your way before.
Loudly yell, what the hell,
And common sense do not ignore.

What the hell?  Let nobody drag you under,
Stand up tall, and tell them it’s not true.
Filled with lies, it’s apparent if you research,
Go on the Internet, and get a clue.

(Chorus)
What the hell?  What the hell?
Let knowledge guide your way before.
Loudly yell, what the hell,
And common sense do not ignore.

What the hell?  There is evidence a-plenty,
Google it, the answers will be clear.
Obvious, the teachings are deceptive,
Do not stay with it because of fear.

(Chorus)
What the hell?  What the hell?
Let knowledge guide your way before.
Loudly yell, what the hell,
And common sense do not ignore.

© Diane Tingen, 6/17/2011

Seriously.  What the Hell???

Thursday, June 2, 2011

SPEAKING OF SHEEP

When I was finishing up my hymn parodies about SHEEP (you know, Dear to the Heart of the Shepherd and Come, Come Ye Sheep), I came across some interesting images of SHEEP, and I just have to share them...

Mormonism Overload

Perhaps still a SHEEP, but with PERSONALITY

Well, at least one of the SHEEP isn't clueless...

DEAR TO THE HEART OF THE MORMONS - LDS Hymn Parody #6

Here's my latest hymn parody - Dear to the Heart of the Mormons (revised from Dear to the Heart of the Shepherd, speaking of all the sheep out there).  With the completion of this hymn parody, I am checking off another one from my original list.  This is one of the hymns I mentioned last week when I began this project, and I think it is definitely apropos to be added to the ExMormon Hymn Book. 

In fact, as I mentioned before, this hymn was one that used to crack up my best friend growing up (who is still very TBM, even now) and I when we were teenagers.  We used to burst into laughter when we were sitting together, singing it in Sacrament Meeting. 

I mean, this hymn (in its original form) is just so dramatic, and the words are so overdone and cheesy.  I really think my new version is a big improvement...

DEAR TO THE HEART OF THE MORMONS
Sung to the tune of Dear to the Heart of the Shepherd, #221

Dear to the heart of the Mormons,
Dear are the sheep they entrap.
Held by the Kool-Aid they’re drinking,
And all the rest of the crap.
But to the anguish of Mormons,
Many are leaving the fold.
All the apostates and ExMos,
Finding the lies they withhold.

(Chorus)
Singling out all the Antis,
Who speak of lies and deceit.
Begging them, “Can’t you be quiet?
Why can’t you be more discreet?”

Dear to the heart of the Mormons,
Touting their lifestyle to all.
Claiming that the Word of Wisdom
Will help us all not to fall.
Saying Joe Smith was a Prophet,
Translating the Word of God.
But they don’t mention his history
Or that he was just a fraud.

(Chorus)
Condemning all of the “Antis,”
Who speak of lies and deceit.
Begging them, “Can’t you be quiet?
Why can’t you be more discreet?”

I was a part of the Mormons
For many years of my life.
I drank the Kool-Aid they offer,
I was an eternal wife.
But when I found the deception,
All of the lies that they tell,
Including the sordid history,
That’s when I bid them farewell.

(Chorus)
That’s when I joined the apostates,
Those who uncovered the lies.
Now unafraid to call bullshit,
Now less naïve and more wise.

© Diane Tingen, 6/2/2011

And one last word about Sheep...
ala Gary Larsen and his Far Side cartoon...