Friday, April 6, 2012


I was looking through some old papers and came across an unfinished poem - actually, my attempt at a limerick with an Ex-Mormon twist.

So I finished it today, and here is the end product:


There once was a prophet named Joe,
Who had an enormous ego,
He made up a church,
But if you research,
The flaws in it will start to show.

A ladies’ man was Brother Joe,
And he did not like hearing No.
Professing God’s will,
His needs he’d fulfill.
His tactics were sordid and low.

A sexual predator loose
As women and girls he’d seduce.
His wandering eye
He’d try to deny,
But simply, there was no excuse.

With sex as his ultimate aim,
Polygamy became his game.
Though Emma refused,
And was not amused,
Soon 33 wives he would claim.

And now Mormonism proclaims
Through media and its campaigns
That it is mainstream,
A marketing scheme,
So clear to a person with brains.

And so with their current slogan,
The billboards say “I’m a Mormon.”
Commercials to see
Each night on TV,
As Pandora’s Box they open.

With history shaded with lies,
And doctrine it hides and denies,
It doesn’t make sense
To mount a defense
When obvious truth they disguise.

And then there's the City Creek Mall,
Now open for business to all.
No homes for the poor,
But shopping galore?
What happened to the proud will fall?

But profits gigantic they seek,
From this brand new mall, City Creek.
With condos high-end,
The money they spend
Will add to the Mormon Mystique.

Professing that they are Christian
Takes more than a passing mention
Of Jesus’ name,
It's not what they claim
There behind the Mormon curtain.

© Diane Tingen, 04/06/2012

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